Driving A Bus

I am in the process of learning how to drive a school bus. Why? The answer is simple... Financial. To make it in San Diego you have to earn a little bit of money. The position that I am in at my church does not afford me with the opportunity for making a whole bunch of money and truly that is not the goal. But, whether I like it or not, we need money to live. Rent happens. Food happens. My girls grow up and need stuff... girl stuff. For that matter, I need stuff. So to help make ends meet and to try and get ahead of the game, I am learning to drive a bus. The pay isn't the best in the world but the hours are way cool and give me the abitlity to still work full time at church. We are hoping that with the extra income we will be able to move out of Hillcrest and to a neighborhood more suited for children. We would like to live where they can play in their own backyard and ride their bikes down the street without having to worry about the "urban" dangers, i.e. busses and the like.

Anyway, back to learning how to drive a bus...

The bus that I am learning how to drive is 40' long. it seats 88 passengers. It's huge. Everything I know about driving has almost been thrown out the window. Knowing how to turn, how to stop and start. Knowing how to judge distance and length. It has been a great experience. The past 3 days (Mon., Tue., & Wed.) have been exhausting. I wonder if I can make some sort of spiritual thing out of this. I wonder if I could connect the two.

I've been on this quest, this spiritual quest, as of late. I'm trying to redefine what I believe, not necessarily change it, just redefine. For example. I've always been taught a sin vs. good sort of theology. I've been taught not to sin and to have a "personal relationship" with Jesus Christ. But what I think is reality is that I am to do the will of the Father. That I am to act and carry myself the way Christ did while he was on this earth. I am to be loving and caring. I am to be Christ-like. I don't think Christ preached a "don't sin or else" kind of message. The result of doing the will of the Father dictates a life that is without sin, not the other way around. I could be wrong on this whole thing. It just "feels" (that's a bad word in Christendom) right. I think that if I truly pursue this Christ-like attitude everything else comes to play.

I'll have to organize my thoughts on this and write more later. Don't worry, I haven't fallen off the deep end, I'm just getting deeper. I'm trying to learn to drive something bigger. :-)